So firstly I need to thank Allah(swt) for giving me a job. Especially in these tough times. It would be to easy to not be thankful for his Mercy and blessings.
I must say for a graduate job I'm very lucky, have had a variety of tasks to do, some responsibility, and now my first trip abroad. I'm being worked hard, which doesn't bother me too much (all though i don't think i could keep it up for too long). But it's the thought that i could spend my life working hard and not being able to show any real achievement at the end of that which scares me. Money comes and goes, so to measure success of a career by that is a false economy. I would like to think that I would measure success my knowing i have made a difference, to someone, in some shape or form. Idealistic maybe? who knows?
I've always feared getting sucked into the corporate vacuum. I've stayed away from finance which i was morally uneasy about. My aim to myself has been to enter the corporate world to get the right training, develop myself professionally, before trying to apply it in another field. Be it via an NGO or a socially responsible business. But 4 months in, I'm less clear then ever about how i can or should achieve my eventual aim. This is one of the many reason's I'm confused.
As i said at the start, i am thankful for having a good job, and compared to many and been blessed with many things. I think i need to appreciate that more, but i do not want to forget my end goal either. Hopefully with time the path will become clearer.